Midnight Manor Private Residence, Wednesday Evening

[hasaknightjob]

The appearance of freshly made latkes had caused a bit of confusion. They'd checked in with Midnight to make sure it hadn't developed a new ability - handy though that ability would have been - and determined it to be one of those Fandom things.

On the plus side they were surprisingly fresh and tasty for all that they randomly appeared. So a changing of plans for some toppings and side dishes meant this could be supper while Steven and Llewellyn tried to watch a film.

"I know it's early but perhaps a holiday film?" Steven suggested, pointing to the summary of it on the screen.

[for the beau]

Comments

[pocketpretzels]

"You know that practically any other time, you would've had the right of it?" Watts said. "So it wasn't as if you were making baseless assumptions."

[hasaknightjob]

"I would have?" Steven asked, looking hopeful.

[pocketpretzels]

"Yes," Watts said firmly. "There's no one else who knows me like you do, Steven Grant."

[hasaknightjob]

"I thought - worried - I'd lost my ability to judge that," Steven admitted.

[pocketpretzels]

"And I am terribly sorry for making you worry about that," Watts said. "I was- rather out of sorts, myself."

[hasaknightjob]

Steven turned enough so he could face Llewellyn better. "That's part of why it bothered me so. You needed something to feel better and I wasn't able to give it to you."

[pocketpretzels]

"You got me sorted in the end," Watts reminded him.

[hasaknightjob]

"I liked that part," Steven said. "That we were able to talk it over and figure it out. Keep going from there. That - I like that we're able to do that."

[pocketpretzels]

"I wholeheartedly agree," Watts said. "It's always a relief, when we manage to clear up whatever misunderstanding we've blundered into. Which," he added. "I may remind you, are rare overall."

[hasaknightjob]

"I was very glad you spoke up," Steven said. "Proud of you, actually."

[pocketpretzels]

"You were?" Watts asked.

[hasaknightjob]

"I was." Steven kissed Llewellyn on the cheek to stress the point even more. "I know it's difficult for you to ask for what you need. That you worry about your needs being too much. It's part of why I felt bad I couldn't give you what you needed straightaway. I always want to give you what you need. Even more when you've done something wonderful like be brave enough to ask for it."

[pocketpretzels]

"Ah," Watts said. "Sometimes I do marvel at what I must have done to deserve someone so wonderful as you."

[hasaknightjob]

"Be wonderful yourself?" Steven replied. "Be patient with me when I don't understand right away? Don't - don't mind that I haven't as much experience as you?"

[pocketpretzels]

"Mmm, selfishly, I like that I am the one you are trying new things for. With," Watts told him.

[hasaknightjob]

"I want to because of you," Steven said, excitedly. "Never really - I mean had sort of thoughts? General ideas? But specifics... well, still working on a lot of the specifics to be honest. The more, erm, complicated? Things? But when I'm with you, you make my heart feel so full. Me feel so warm inside. It makes me want to try? Even if I'm not sure what I'm meant to be trying?"

[pocketpretzels]

"Things that feel good, is what it boils down to," Watts said. "And you know- I may have had- more sexual encounters than you. But that doesn't mean- I've hardly done everything there is to do between two men, I'm certain."

[hasaknightjob]

"I can't trust my memories before you," Steven said. Which Llewellyn knew, even in this context, but Steven felt it bore repeating. "That if anything I think I've done I've actually done. I know I like being with you. I like touching you, being intimate with you. Showing you how much I love you with more than words. I may not be particularly fancy about it, but whatever I do is with my entire heart. For you."

[pocketpretzels]

"I don't need fancy," Watts said firmly. "I need you."

[hasaknightjob]

Steven felt a warmth bloom in his chest at Llewellyn saying that. But even so he still needed to check. "Even if I don't know all the things to do? Or the words to say?"

[pocketpretzels]

"Even so," Watts said. "As I said, I don't know them all either."

[hasaknightjob]

"I don't - " Steven tried to figure out how to put it. "I've seen the words? I can read. Internet's very handy. But it doesn't feel me to say them all? I don't want to say them just to say them. But I don't want you feeling I'm not saying them because I'm ashamed of what we do. Or of you."

[pocketpretzels]

"I see," Watts nodded, absorbing that. "And I suppose- I am a plain-spoken sort of man. I acknowledge that. But I would never use the word 'fuck' to describe our sexual relations. For example. It simply does not align with how I feel."

[hasaknightjob]

"Yes!" Steven said, brightening as he saw Llewellyn understood it. "Neither do I. It's similar with other words. Or I'm more comfortable speaking euphemistically. Not because I'm ashamed but it's the language I prefer? I love you. There's nothing crass about it. Not - not that harder words are crass but - "

Steven's shoulders slumped as he lost some of his momentum. "I'm putting it poorly now."

[pocketpretzels]

"No, no, I understand what you mean," Watts assured him. "It's only when you- when you don't use words at all. That it can be unclear. That's what had me concerned, the other day, that you might be- embarrassed. Ashamed. But you set me right, there."